Lets be Honest....

The day started with me waking up and just reflecting on the week. People and Dora(when we talked) have been pushing for me to go out with other people. I think thats all I did all week. Its like sitting there and looking right through them, the wine helps. I was talking to this guy Joel (I happened to go over to his church awhile back) and he had asked if I had two dates at the same time the night before, the answer was yes. He asked was it enough, enough to get my head out of this thing. The answer was, NO. Pushing through work and this dating stuff really isn't doing anything to really get my mind away from things, its almost like when you turnaround and you think you see something or you just remember or think about them. So I thought the drowning myself in wine, liquor, and beer could put it away for me, that hasn't worked out that well, either. Except for forgetting for a day, and driving drunk and not remembering what the hell happened.

So after sitting there in my car this morning(I think it was for like 20 min.), I heard some church bells ringing. I wasn't going to go. So I sat there for about another 10 min., contemplating if I'd go. I ended up going, then after going to breakfast. On the way to breakfast, I got a call to work on a children's book if I was interested. I put my last cash in for gas and breakfast and met up with one of the Hispanic artists I've been talking to. He introduced me around and then looks at me and says you look lost brother. I guess I'm that transparent when I'm not concentrating. They had some good work there though. So the plan for the day: Fix some more walls in my shop, work on a custom job for some one, and look at a couple of scripts. Oh yeah and not wait for the phone to ring, even though it would be nice. I think I'm gonna stay in my shop to finish this piece tonight. Here is the play list for the day so go to You Tube and watch the videos and music. Let me know if you've read this and are feeling something...that would help. Don't forget to call people.

Bleed it Out--Linkin Park
Can't forget about you----Nas
Last Night------P.diddy
Encore-------jay-z/Linkin Park