The Finality of it all

I've gotten the chance the last couple of days to sit down and think about where things stand. This being the last month in the year and all I thought it was appropriate. So everything from Break-ups, to people ready to go but not really ready, to the final days of my marriage.

Its true the break-up was something that really broke me down and made me more vulnerable than I'd like to remember. It doesn't mean that I regret what Dora and I had or have really. Do I wish things were better or Do I still want her?.........That's really something that I'm keeping to myself, and the answer might surprise you or maybe not.

Now the loved ones leaving falls down to my grandfather. They helped raise me as much as my parents, and now his body I think wants to give up on him. Doctors say the medicine and vitamins they are giving him don't do anything anymore and his body just won't take to them anymore. So I have to go away to Texas A.S.A.P., to say hello and good-bye before its too late. I would be really pissed off and hurt if I was too late . Things that I've done in my life, goals that were set and achieved were never just for me. My grandpa's name is Albert, my dad's name is Albert, and my name is Albert. I'm the the third and the last. I beat every goal with that in mind. All the hopes my family ever had for themselves and others I carry on my shoulders so that they know it was never impossible and can be proud everyday....So that they can walk around tall because all there hopes and dreams are alive, and that someone has no limits to what can be done. That's why I fight as hard as I do, and when I break down its worse than most because.....sometimes I do need someone there. My life and my dreams are bigger and more opinionated, because I will NOT fail, I will NOT fold. For my family , I will be everything they ever wanted to be and more.

As for the end of my marriage, am I upset that its over? Not really. I've always taken care of the people around me. If they need something all they have to do is ask. Even if they don't ask I make sure they are alright, even if they think I'm not watching. I've never had to look at someone directly to know what they are doing or what's going on. She'll be alright and taken care of, as much as my sister's ex-husband. If he ever needed anything he would only have to ask. Of course the other side of that generosity with anyone, is that I'm the last person you EVER want to make angry. I can be your best friend or your worst...and again I don't even have to look at you to do it.

Its coming closer to the end of the year, and I have this itch to come out guns blazing. I've got some new pieces that I want to lay down. So maybe I'll see you maybe I won't. Everyone knows where to find me. But not everybody can come home.